Two Lost Souls - One Shared Fate
by EmeraldEyes23
Summary: This is a post-canon story Ghost AU where Eiji comes to NYC after his pole-vaulting accident. But Ash has already been stabbed and is on the brink of death. Eiji just happens to live in his old apartment. While studying in the Public Library, he encounters Ash's ghost who doesn't remember anything but insists he isn't dead (yet)... So Eiji starts investigating...
1. A Flyboy With Broken Wings

Eiji could still hear his ankle shattering sometimes. The earsplitting sound that made him wake up screaming or left him trembling if he was awake. He would never forget that sound. That sound meant that his world had ended. Everything he had ever hoped for, wished for, longed for. It took some weeks until the harsh truth dawned on him. Until he couldn't pretend any longer nothing had happened and had to face reality. When reality began to sink in. At that point it all came crashing down on him. Not at once. It came slowly, sneaking in like a poison that slowly killed you from the inside over time until he was nothing more, but a human shell, a puppet with cut strings. A body without a soul. Empty. Lifeless. Emotionally dead. At that point he had just shut himself in his room, refused to eat or talk to anyone and just lay in his bed, hiding under his blanket because nothing in his life mattered anymore. A flyboy with broken wings. A canary who can't sing.

His parents were worried, he was aware of that. He just didn't care at the moment. All he wanted was to be left alone. After some weeks his parents finally lost their patience and forced him to see a therapist. Eiji just agreed to it because he was too numb and too lazy to fight with them. He didn't talk to the therapist, either. He just sat there with vacant, indifferent eyes and didn't say anything. Big surprise. If he wanted to talk, he would talk to one of his friends, not a complete stranger that didn't even know what pole vaulting was. After some weeks the therapist gave up, prescribed him some pills and told his parents apparently that maybe a fresh start or a change of scenery would help him get better again.

His mother had obviously called Ibe and had told him what had happened. Because a few days later, he really came all the way just to see him. Ibe couldn't hide his astonishment when seeing him, staring at him wide-eyed in complete disbelief. He apparently looked that bad, huh? But Eiji saw the relief on his mother's face when he left the house for the first time in weeks. He only did it because he wanted to speak to Ibe alone. Ibe had always listened to him and knew about his situation at home. He was like a big brother to him, not a father. Since he wasn't that much older than him, it was easier to talk to him. If he was lucky, he wouldn't judge him as his family did.

Moreover, Ibe had taken all those photos of him, watching him pole vault for weeks. So he desperately hoped that Ibe would understand better what he had gone through and how much this accident had destroyed him. That this had been so much more than a mere sport to him. It was his way to fly, to escape from here and be truly happy for a moment. Pole vaulting made him feel alive and completely free. He could forget everything around him for a fraction of a second.

How his father was in hospital and would eventually die. How his mother was flirting with another man right in front of his eyes. How he had to take care of many things at home and take responsibility since his sister was too small. How he could never go out with friends because money was tight and he just couldn't afford it or even find the time for it.

Pole vaulting had been the only thing that had put a smile on his face. The reason he got up everyday. And now everything was over… His scholarship would be revoked any time now and he would have no other chance than to quit college and find a boring and underpaid job. All the dreams he had, they didn't matter anymore. He would never achieve them anyway… so why even bother trying?

"Eiji, what the hell happened to you? You look awful. Like you haven't slept or eaten for weeks.

Eiji smiled sadly, knowing what was coming now. Eiji had really hoped that Ibe wouldn't tell him what all the people had told him before, proving that they didn't understand his circumstances at all:

_I'm sorry this has happened to you, Eiji, but it's just a minor injury. It will heal. Why don't you try find something else you like? Another hobby or sport?_

That was usually followed by:

_"It's just a damn sport, Eiji. Don't you think you're overly dramatic? Aren't you overreacting?_

But Ibe just sat down with him on a bank and looked at him.

"Tell me what happened. Please."

Eiji wanted to refuse since all people in his life had asked him the exact same question. His parents, his doctors, his friends, his neighbors, his therapist. But unlike all the other people, Ibe's eyes didn't show disappointment or pity, but only warmth, honesty and concern as he put an arm around his shoulder. So Eiji just sighed and began to tell him the whole story from the beginning. When he had ended, the tears that he hadn't been able to shed before finally began to fall. Because he had felt just empty and hopeless all the time. Because he had no one who really understood his situation. No one had been able to sympathize with what he had gone through. He felt like a complete failure as a human being without any hope for a future. What was he supposed to do without a college degree?

Now that he finally had started talking, everything he had bottled up for weeks flowed out of him, so he was unable to stop himself. All the emotions he had suppressed for so long: hurt, pain, guilt, grief, hopelessness, desperation, Ibe let him talk without saying anything, apparently feeling that Eiji had to let it all out. When Eiji began crying silently, he just hugged him until his tears stopped falling.

"I'm sorry this has happened to you, Ei-chan. I know pole vaulting was more than a sport to you and has always played an important part in your life. I also know that the situation with your family isn't the best. But still, you can't go on like this. Drowning in self-pity is not the right way of handling this. You have to do something. Find a way out of your situation.", Ibe told him honestly.

Eiji nodded quietly, leaning forward, a hand covering his eyes. He knew that Ibe was right, but he didn't know how he could overcome this desperate situation he was in.

"But what am I supposed to do? I can't continue to go to college. My scholarship will be revoked, so I can't complete my studies. My grades are good, but not that good that I get a scholarship that way.", Eiji explained honestly, looking sadly at him, close to tearing up again.

"Come with me to New York. I've been living there for some time now. You can get a fresh start there."

"You mean you flew here from New York?!", Eiji exclaimed in surprise, his eyes widening. "Just for me?"

"Yes. I wanted to make you an offer. I have a friend at the university in New York. She owes me a favor and I told her about your situation. She told me she'd talk to your university and you could work for me part-time and go to university there. She has just sent me the paperwork. You just have to hand in some documents and organize the formalities. I buy you a ticket and pay you enough to get by in New York. And since your circumstances are special, your university agreed to grant you a scholarship for one year in New York because your grades are excellent as well. They'll also help you find an apartment there."

Eiji just stared at him. "You did all of that for me? Why?"

"Because I worry about you. Your family worries, too. Your therapist told your parents that a fresh start would help you. And I really need a good assistant. I couldn't find one who could also understand Japanese. My English is not that good…", he said, running a hand through his hair. "You have a really good eye. I've seen your photos. They're good. Besides, my success as a photographer

started with your photos when I won that photo contest. So, in a way, I owe you.", he smiled encouragingly at him. "So, what do you think?"

"I think this is too good to be true. But I'll do it."

"Great. You look so much better now. And you can finally smile again. But you need some weeks to organize everything. Unfortunately, I can't stay this long, so you have to come to NYC by yourself. Just call me when you'll arrive and I'll pick you up."

"Thanks, Ibe. "I honestly don't know what to say."

"Just promise me you will come. And that you'll stop worrying everyone around you. This is your chance, Ei-chan. Make the most of it."

Eiji just nodded. "Thank you."

Some weeks later, he arrived in New York with a suitcase and big duffel bag. His ankle protested loudly at the weight he was carrying, but for the first time Eiji didn't care. His injury had healed long ago according to his doctor and Eiji knew the pain was more psychosomatic. Hopefully, it would disappear when he had settled down here.

After he had talked with Ibe, he had tried to change his life. He had talked to his parents and his friends, had apologized and tried to explain his behavior to them. He had asked his mother if he could see that therapist again and had talked to him about his injury, had taken the medication he had been prescribed and had slowly noticed how he felt better. At the end he had been able to reduce the pills. He had also handled all the paperwork with his university and was at least able to walk without crutches. It wasn't perfect, but it was a start in the right direction.

In New York he could finally breathe again. It was as if he had been holding his breath for the last few weeks without noticing it. Everything felt, smelt and looked so different here. Like a new world. A new start. Eiji smiled for the first time.

Ibe had offered to pick him up, but Eiji had kindly refused, saying he had an appointment with his landlord and wanted to have a look at his apartment first. He found the address without problems (compared to finding an address in Tokyo, finding an address here was a walk in the park) and talked to his land lord. He was pretty nice and told him, the apartment has not a lot of furniture and to throw away the few things the previous tenant left there. He was deceased and had no one to come pick up his stuff.

Eiji had just agreed to it because he had gotten the apartment pretty cheap and within that short amount of time it hadn't been easy to find an apartment in New York. All the apartments on the university campus had already been occupied by the time he had asked. He could switch at the end of this semester if he was lucky. So Eiji didn't ask too many questions and just accepted the offer.

Of course, Ibe had offered that he could stay with him at the beginning, but Eiji didn't want to be a burden, especially after all he had done for him. And he wanted to enjoy his new freedom and his gained independence.

When he opened the door, he suddenly knew why the apartment had been so cheap. It wasn't cleaned, the apartment looked run down and dusty and the walls looked dirty. Obviously no one had opened the windows for months. There were two rooms. In one there was just a bed, a desk with a bookshelf and some drawers on the right side. On the left side there was a computer on a simple wooden table, another chair and some books and papers were lying everywhere across the floor.

In the room next to it there was a sofa, a table and a shelf. A dusty old lamp was hanging from the ceiling, the only light source in this dark room since the window was really small. And so dirty you couldn't look outside.

There was also a small, but barely used kitchen and a bath room, both had obviously not cleaned in months. The apartment looked as if no one had really lived here. The kitchen had obviously never been used, there weren't even any kitchen utensils, let alone plates or cups. The only things he found was a bottle opener. Great!

Eiji sighed and put his suitcase and jacket in a corner. That would he a hard piece of work.

So, after buying some basic things for the apartment and some cleaning products, Eiji had scrubbed the floors thoroughly, removed the dirt on all the walls and cleaned the windows, so you could actually see outside. He also cleaned all the rooms and put all the belongings of his previous tenant in a plastic box he had found under the bed.

After cleaning it already looked much nicer. Eiji slowly looked around. The room felt strangely cold. There were no personal belongings at all: no photos, no posters, no backpack, no smartphone. Not even a TV When he got closer to the bed to inspect if it was even safe or even healthy sleeping on there, he stepped on a plank of wood that had suddenly gotten loose. Before Eiji could even react the plank had swung up and hit him right in the face. Eiji fell down on the floor with a loud thump. Ouch! That will definitely leave a nice little bump on his forehead. But then he realized with a start that someone had hidden some stuff there and stared into the hole in disbelief.

_Is that … a gun? A real one?!_

_What kind of mess have I gotten myself into now?!_


	2. The Haunted Rose Reading Room

Eiji took a walk through Bryant Park. In the morning, he had talked to his study counselor and had worked out his schedule for college. After that he had talked to Ibe and looked around his studio. They had looked over his courses at college and when and how many hours he would work with Ibe in the afternoon.

He had asked Ibe if there was a place nearby where he could study. One that was close to his studio and college. His apartment was too far away, so he preferred taking his breaks somewhere where he could study and have a break until he worked with Ibe.

So Ibe had told him about the Public Library next to Bryant Park. But he also told him it was pretty crowded at times. Which wasn't a problem for a Eiji since he had always been an early riser. But Ibe somehow looked uncomfortable. There had to be something he wasn't telling him. He had actually hesitated slightly before suggesting the library to him. Eiji was pretty sensitive to emotions around him and had noticed that instantly. After a moment of awkward silence, Ibe had finally told him about the rumor that had been running wild among the students for a few weeks now.

Ibe was on college campus from time to time because he didn't give courses, but he offered workshops once in a while because a friend from college had asked him to.

According to Ibe there was a rumor currently going around campus that the Public Library was haunted. Or cursed. Same difference. Ibe reluctantly told him that people were scared to go there because their stuff kept disappearing, chairs and other things moved on their own or papers were blown away and were flying across the room. Even books were suddenly falling out of shelves without warning. Last week someone had even been injured because the whole book shelf fell down on her. The strange thing was that those weird events were limited to the Rose Reading Room only.

Eiji just burst out laughing when Ibe had finished. Rumors like that are always exaggerated immensely, so there would probably be a logic explanation. Like an open window or a broken door. But it sounded fascinating. He'd be sure to check it out, if only to satisfy his curiosity. Ibe saw the shocked face when he saw that Eiji wasn't scared, but curious.

So, here he was, standing on 5th Avenue, with only the busy traffic separating him from the library.

It looked kind of impressive, just how you imagined a historic building that was over 100 years old to look like. The three archways in the middle were impressive as were the huge lion statues on each side of the building or the statues above the archway whose exact shapes Eiji couldn't make out yet.

Of course, as a photographer, he had to take some pictures first which was the whole reason why he had made that little detour. Then he crossed the street and walked into the building, taking some more photos. The interior was amazing as well with more archways and walls covered in white marble. Most of them were decorated with beautiful ornaments and many historic books and other historic items on display everywhere. The interior was breathtaking, but if he was perfectly honest he had to admit that he had never been much of a book worm. That's why he slowly lost interest and walked straight to the Rose Main Reading Room on the third floor.

According to the flyer the room had the length of a football field. When he entered, the first thing he saw were the long tables on the right and left and a walking path in between them, reminding him of a red carpet. Maybe not entirely wrong considering how many famous writers, researchers and even Pulitzer Prize winners had already been here. The best thing was probably the ceiling with those breathtakingly beautiful murals of vibrant skies and billowing clouds.

Eiji took some photos and then looked for a table to sit. For a normal afternoon it was pretty empty here. The other floors had been so flooded with people that to call it crowded would be an understatement.

He put his backpack and his camera on the table and began to shuffle through all the documents from college, putting them in a chronological order and beginning to draw a time table that included the work with Ibe as well as his college courses, so he got a better overview over his daily routine and his free time. He had also gotten several assignments already since he had missed the beginning of the semester and had to keep up with the required assignments.

That's when he noticed the breeze going around the room. The room suddenly felt cold and all the lights were flickering while some books were falling out of the shelves. Eiji shivered and quickly put his camera on the papers, then curiously looked around the room. There had to be a reason for all of that...

But he didn't see anything, so he just shrugged and continued going through his papers. He was so immersed in his papers and photos that he didn't realize his presence at first. Only when he began to levitate his camera in the air, he got his attention. When he finally noticed him and looked up, the guy was standing right next to him with crossed arms, a wild look in his green eyes and looking threateningly at him. His whole attitude radiated danger.

But that wasn't the only thing Eiji noticed. The darkness that dominated and overshadowed his eyes fascinated and intimidated Eiji at the same time. But beyond that darkness was also a deep loneliness and a heartbreaking sadness that made Eiji want to know more about him.

His appearance was faint, but not entirely transparent. Why? Weren't ghosts supposed to be transparent? But Eiji could still see his messy blonde hair, some strands hanging across his face. And the stunningly beautiful green color of his eyes as he kept staring at him with that intense look he had. He was standing there in his red converse, his ripped blue jeans and his white t-shirt. Eiji just couldn't look away from him. He had led a much harder life than himself, he saw that in his clouded eyes right away. It was in the way he was standing there, self-confident and powerful, his wild eyes having a dangerous glint in them, commanding and terrifying. Like a true leader. Eiji wondered what kind of life he had lead. What kind of hardships he had experienced to always assume the worst in people. Because his whole body language radiated Stay away from me.

~

Ash looked out of the window.. There wasn't much to see apart from other buildings around him, rush hour traffic and huge crowds of people rushing from one appointment to the other. But the look outside felt strangely familiar to him. As did the inside of the place he had appeared in several weeks ago.

Why the hell was he suddenly here? At a library? What was he even doing here of all places? And what was happening to him? When he saw no reflection in the window, he looked down at himself for the first time. Sure, he had always been pale, but that was pushing it to new limits. He nearly looked transparent. But not completely transparent as a ghost on TV. You could still see a faint color in his appearance. The color of his skin, his clothes, his eyes, his hair. They all appeared more faint, as if the color was more and more fading away...

Only when he had tried to lean on the frame of the window once, but somehow had fallen through the definitely closed window, he had noticed that everything that had happened to him recently was strange. He also discovered by chance that he could disappear and reappear at another place at will... But only limited to the Rose Reading Room. He couldn't appear in other rooms or leave the building. Something was definitely wrong here... Was he really...

_A ghost?! But how –_

_No, that made no sense. Ghosts don't exist. _

_And I'm not dead –_

_Wait, how do I even know that...?_

He didn't know. In fact, he couldn't remember anything. Why he was here, how he had gotten here. Or what had happened to his body. Or where it was for that matter... The only thing he did remember was his name: Aslan Callenreese. That he had a brother he called Griff. And that they both grew up in a house in Cape Cod. Everything else was a mystery.

The harder he tried to remember, the more everything faded away. The only thing he accomplished with that was that many different pictures were flickering in front of his eyes in fast forward mode. So fast he couldn't make out anything but blurry colors. It drove him mad. But since he was a ghost or a non-corporeal entity, he couldn't even bang his head against a wall in frustration or punch a hole in the wall. He had tried both which only resulted in him moving through the wall. Fuck. If that wall left the Rose Reading Room, he was thrown back into it as if bouncing off an obstacle. There was no way out. The Rose Reading Room was his personal solitary confinement.

He couldn't really explain it, but somehow he was still feeling a faint connection to his body. Like a thin, invisible string that was the only thing that connected him to his body. So he instinctively knew he wasn't dead. Yet. But it was so faint that it was probably just a matter of time...

He had to check some things first before he lost the bit of sanity he had left. The first thing he noticed was that he couldn't touch things, but he could make them float through the air at will.

He could also create wind and breezes. He noticed that incidentally when some stranger walked right through him and he instinctively forced him to drop all his papers and books by creating a strong breeze. Well, that had actually been kind of fun.

He was aware of his desperate situation and didn't scare and annoy the students here just for fun. Ok, he could at least admit to himself that it was pretty funny to see their terrified expressions when things suddenly moved around them or disappeared only to reappear in another place. But moving objects and cause breezes was the only way he could find out if anyone could see him. When doing that, he always scrutinized all of their faces only to notice that no one could see or feel his presence.

He especially did that to students who were sitting in one specific spot. He didn't know why exactly, but that spot felt special to him, as if it had belonged to him once. As if he had a personal attachment to that place. He was unsure of the reasons, but when people were sitting there it was like a personal insult or a challenge to him.

After a while no one dared to sit there anymore and it was general knowledge to avoid that place because it was haunted.

Ash wondered how he could get out of his situation. He couldn't look up anything because he couldn't touch objects, so he couldn't research things on a computer or by reading articles in the newspaper archive. Which was really ironic since he was surrounded by knowledge here, but couldn't access it. He just felt so powerless and drowned in self-pity. Sometimes the thought occurred to him that he had somehow deserved that fate. Maybe he had done something bad in the past. Maybe he was evil, a criminal or a monster...

But before he really died, he at least wanted to regain his memories. Even if they were terrifying or devastatingly painful, it was still better to remember them than to be completely left in the dark. He needed help, but how would he able to get that if no one could even see him?

That's when he saw someone suddenly sitting down at "his" table again. It was half an hour before the library closed again.No one else was here except for someone working at the information desk at the entrance.

So Ash's curiosity got the better of him and he was floating until he was next to him. The guy looked ordinary, plain even, but Ash had never seen such huge eyes before. He looked like a grade schooler, but the professional camera, his photos, his books and documents suggested otherwise. His photos were pretty good. They were full of life and vivid colors, showing bright images reflecting happiness and love. They portrayed how he saw the world: as a beautiful, warm and colorful place with endless possibilities.

_His photos are great, but his sloppy handwriting is awful. Let's not get started with all the grammar and spelling mistakes..._

Without thinking really, Ash began to move some things, probably out of habit. But the student didn't seem to care, he was so fixated on his photos and his camera that he didn't even notice what Ash was doing. Which made Ash slowly get annoyed. Just when he had made his camera float in the air to get his attention, the student did something Ash had never expected him to do. Ever.

He looked directly into his eyes. Not through him, not next to him, but right at him.

"If you're done messing with my things, I'd appreciate it if you put them back in place. That camera was expensive and I can't afford another one."

Ash just stared at him wide-eyed while pure surprise crossed his face.

_Fuck, he can really see me? Why? How?_

That was the first thought that came to his mind. He hated to admit that even to himself, but for a fraction of a second a spark of happiness surged through him. And there was another emotion he hadn't felt for a long time.

_Hope_.

The student kept staring at him, his huge brown eyes looking directly into his own with obvious curiosity. Ash wanted to look away, but something in his eyes kept him from doing so. He wasn't afraid. Or shocked. Wasn't it normal to be scared of a ghost? Shouldn't your first reaction be to run away?

Yet, he was just staring at him, fumbling nervously with the sleeve of his hoodie, as if he wanted to talk to him, to ask him something. But still summoning up the courage to do so. And he had this damn innocent look on his face that looked kind of dumb, but radiated honesty and warmth at the same time. Those warm eyes were like a magnet drawing him closer and closer.

It irritated the hell out of Ash. He stubbornly crossed his arms while glaring at him in what he thought was a threatening look, his eyes hopefully sparkling dangerously in the dimly lit room. He stood there, self-confident and powerful, hoping it would scare him. It didn't.

Yeah, ok, the guy just stared at him wide-eyed with a mixture of intimidation and surprise. But instead of getting the usual reaction he has gotten used to, that boy's face radiated...pure wonder. And fascination. Surprise. But not fear, terror or shock... Interesting...

For a moment the thought crossed his mind that he could help him. But why would he ever do that? He didn't even know him... Someone as innocent-looking as him wouldn't be able to help him anyway...

Still, the fact that he wasn't surprised or scared at all fascinated him. He had never come across such an open and honest face before. All his emotions were playing across his face, he didn't even try to hide them. He'd never seen such warm eyes before, staring at him not with suspicion, but with open curiosity and interest.

But still, why would a random stranger help him... That was too good to be true. He'd probably had an ulterior motive or ask for something disgusting in return. He probably just looked innocent, but hid some dark secret behind his cute face... Innocent people always used their looks to their advantage. Because people let their guard down if you looked innocent. A scene from his past suddenly flashed through his mind.

_「He was a street kid, surrounded by some older guys who had noticed him... They'd also underestimated him because he looked innocent, frail and scared. But in a flash Ash had turned his greatest weakness into his greatest strength by knocking one guy out, taking his gun and shooting the other...」_

_I knew it. I'm a bad person, a devil. I didn't even hesitate to shoot someone... The way I reacted, that wasn't the first time... That's why I'm on the brink of death. Because I deserve it... I should just accept my fate... _

"Leave! Now!", Ash said coldly, his stubborn attitude returning.

When Ash had told him that, the guy's eyes turned to him and a new determination dawned on his features.

"No. I won't leave. Unless you tell me why. If you give me a good reason, I'll do it."

Ash actually thought about that for a moment. He had no idea why he was so fixated on that place. It felt kind of nostalgic or personal to him. As if someone invaded his privacy. Maybe he had spent much time here...? He felt relaxed here. But he didn't know why. Damn it. So he asked a question he'd been dying to know, changing the topic.

"Why can you see me? And hear my voice? No one else can..."

"I guess I'm more open-minded than other people towards supernatural things. In Japan supernatural creatures are more common than here. At least in myths, legends and stories. Am I really the only one here who can see you?", he asked curiously. "I'm Eiji, by the way."

"Yeah, you are the only one. Congratulations, Eiji.", he sneered. "Japan, huh? That explains you're messy handwriting. And your awful English."

Eiji pouted and glared at him, wondering if Americans were always this rude or if that was limited to ghosts only? That ghost was acting tough, but Eiji could still see that he was lost and he had never seen so much sadness and loneliness in someone's eyes before. So he'd ignore his rude behavior for once...

"So, if you're a ghost does that mean you're dead? Or is there a reason why you're here? You must have a connection to this place..."

"Mind your own business! Are you always this nosy?", Ash glared at him.

"Drop your stubborn attitude, ok? If no one could see me, I'd be pretty frustrated by now. Which is why I will overlook your more than rude behavior and offer my help. What can I do? Let's face it, I'm the only one who can help you, you know that, too, right?"

Ash just stared at him, surprised by his blunt answer. But he had indeed been rude, pushing him away and refusing help. That kind of thing felt familiar to him. But he had to admit that he was right. Eiji was his only option. Even if he had a hard time trusting people, what did he have to lose? He was already dying somewhere anyway. So what could Eiji do? Kill him before the coma did?

"Why would you help me...? You don't even know me...", Ash questioned him, suspicion all over his pale face. After hesitating for a moment, he reluctantly added something else.

"I can't remember anything. I only know that my name is Aslan Jade Callenreese and that I'm originally from Cape Cod. That I have a brother called Griffin. And that we lived there together in a small house. Everything else remains a mystery to me... I get flashbacks from time to time, but I don't recognize anyone or remember their names..."

"Ok, that's not much to go on...", Eiji admitted honestly. Ash just glared at him, stubbornly turning away from him.

"That's what I get from letting a spoilt kid help me...", Ash muttered in be frustration.

Eiji froze and glared at him, his eyes burning brightly in defiance. "I'm 20, just so you know!"

Then he sighed. "I understand your situation, but..."

Ash faced him again, but avoided his gaze. "Thank you. I was an ungrateful bastard. Just try your best, ok?"

Eiji nodded, smiling thankfully.

"Ok, let me do some research. Maybe I'll find something out. What else do you know?"

"Nothing!", Ash exclaimed in frustration. Then he froze because he had just remembered something else. "The only thing I know is that I'm not dead yet. I can still feel a connection to my body. But it's faint. Maybe I'm in a coma."

"That's great!", Eiji exclaimed happily. Then it dawned on him that what he had just said was completely insensitive.

"I'm sorry, Aslan. It's not great that you're in a coma and probably in a critical condition right now. I meant that's a great piece of information because we just have to look through all the hospitals and we'd be able to find out where you're being treated.", he tried to explain his train of thought.

"It's fine. You really want to help me, huh? You're serious? What's in it for you?", he asked suspiciously, this time more firmly. A random stranger helping him was way too simple...

"Nothing. I just want to help you.", Eiji told him truthfully. Then an idea came to him because his eyes lit up suddenly. "Maybe you can do me a small favor?"

_I knew it. Of course, there would be a catch. Why am I not surprised...?_

"Can you help me choose some photos for my latest photo project for college?", Eiji asked him timidly. "I can't decide which ones to choose. The theme is city life." Eiji spread all the photos he had across the table, showing them to him.

Ash just looked at him as if he was completely crazy.

"That's all you want me to do?"

Eiji just nodded, smiling up at him.


	3. Final Destination New York?

_The Rose Reading Room. A coma. Lost memories. And a ghost... All these things had to be connected somehow..._

Eiji went home after meeting Aslan. He had a lot to think about on his way home. He knew he should probably worry about his studies and keeping up with all the assignments. 

But his thoughts always returned to Aslan. He had never seen so deeply-rooted sorrow and pain in anyone's eyes before. It was like a stab directly into his heart. He looked so lost and lonely. He couldn't forget the face he made when he told him he'd help him. Before suspicion darkened his eyes again, there was a moment where something else lit up his eyes:

Hope.

Ok, he could do without his stubborn tough-guy-act and his impulsive and rude outbursts at times, but maybe that was just frustration because he couldn't remember anything. Or do anything. Eiji had experienced on his own how it felt to be powerless. When you wanted to turn back time, to change something, but couldn't. Eiji would have given anything to undo his pole vaulting accident and his shattered ankle. 

However, seeing Aslan and his desperation made him forget his own problems for the first time. Aslan was barely alive and desperately fighting for his life at the moment. His shattered ankle was insignificant in comparison and made him feel like a spoilt brat. Getting to know Ash woke him up from his egotistical, self-centered and gloomy thoughts. He didn't know what Aslan had gone through. With how suspicious he was acting, he had probably made some bad experiences that had proved to him that he could only trust himself. Such bad experiences that Eiji couldn't even begin to imagine...

Eiji didn't want to let him down. He'd spend the evening looking for clues. He'd start with an internet search. Maybe something would turn up. That was a pretty simple idea, one that Aslan would likely comment with That's all you can come up with? But he had to start somewhere and this was as good as anything else...

But before doing some research, he wanted to look through the belongings of his previous tenant. It was just a hunch, but the name Callenreese seemed familiar somehow. As if he had seen it before. But he couldn't remember where. So, maybe he had seen it in the belongings of his previous tenant when he had cleaned the room...

After he had cooked something for himself, he looked for the box and put it on the floor. Then he kneeled down next to it and began looking through them. Most of the belongings he had just stuffed in there without paying any attention to them. After a while of rummaging through it, he found something. It was a picture. A five-year-old was in it, holding a baseball cap in his hands while looking at the camera. Next to him was an older man who had bent down next to him, putting an arm around his shoulder. Both were wearing baseball clothes and were smiling at the camera. On the back of the photo was written: Aslan and Griffin Callenreese, Cape Cod. The photo had obviously been folded many times and had been carried everywhere because the color had faded and it looked worn and was torn at some places. That photo had obviously been a precious memory to someone.

_There it is! The name Callenreese. Aslan! And Griffin! I knew it! But that couldn't be possible... _

So his previous tenant was Aslan himself? Was that possible? Talk about a major coincidence. Or maybe it was fate?!

His interest in Aslan's belonging was suddenly aroused considerably as he went through his belongings. He looked through all of his things. Apparently Aslan was pretty smart. He had found some essays he had written, predicting the economy's changes in the next few decades. There were some other essays as well that were brilliantly written as far as Eiji could tell. He couldn't understand everything with his poor English, but it was enough to notice that he was more intelligent than most boys his age. Underneath those essays were some photos. On one of them was a younger Aslan together with a guy with a purple mohawk. He had an arm around Ash and grinned mischievously while Aslan looked stubbornly into the camera. But there was still a half smile on his face that he was unable to hide. 

On another photo was a small house surrounded by a little garden with the sea in the background. That was probably where he had lived in Cape Cod. 

He also found many books. Classic literature. Even Eiji knew some of the authors: Hemingway, Fitzgerald, Salinger. Hemingway seemed to be his favorite author because the books had obviously been read a lot and taken good care of. In one of the books was an army photo. If Eiji compared the old photo to this, Eiji could make out which of them was Griffin. So, Griffin was in the army? There was another photo where some fellow soldier had put an arm around his shoulder and both were grinning into the camera. They seemed close. Not just comrades, but friends. Max Glenreed. That was the name written on the back.

The army photos reminded Eiji of some letters he had seen in the little hideout under one of the planks where he had found the gun. He went back to it and inspected it more closely. 

Sure, enough there was a stack of letters. Some letters were more than 10 years old. The date was on the postal stamp on each of the letters. Eiji didn't want to go through them, but he also wanted to help Aslan. So he just opened the oldest one, hoping he would get some information. From what he figured out Griffin and Aslan had lived in the house on the photo by themselves. Their father had practically abandoned them and Griff, only a teenager himself at the time, had taken care of Aslan. No wonder they were so close...

Apparently their father was called Jim and owned a diner. He lived with a woman called Jennifer who, according to Griffin's writing, was rather nice and often brought them food and anything else they needed. Their father couldn't care less apparently.

Eiji checked the hole out and found bundles of dollar bills. That had to be several thousands of dollars. Under it were some bundles of papers that Eiji didn't understand. It looked like a chemical analysis of something. Since that didn't lead to anything he just closed the plank again and turned to his own computer. 

He just googled Aslan's name and Cape Cod. At the beginning he didn't find anything, until he narrowed the search down. Remembering the photo with his brother, he added baseball. That's when he finally found something useful. The Bluebird of Cape Cod. Apparently, the person called this was an highly decorated Army Veteran who was popular in Cape Cod because he coached the boys' Baseball team there. The adults as well as the kids all liked him, so no one suspected anything. 

Until he was shot with a gun in his own home. Apparently by an eight-year-old kid. After that the cops investigated his house and found kids' bones in the basement. He had raped the kids and eventually killed them to cover up the truth.

_That 8-year-old kid... no, it couldn't be, right...?_

Eiji researched a little more about that incident. The police didn't release the kid's name since he was a minor, but when Eiji searched around some more in forums and read the comments about the articles, It was obvious that everyone knew that Aslan had shot him. The town was rather small and rumors spread fast. 

A single tear ran down Eiji's face while he placed a trembling hand across his open mouth as he stared at the screen. Trying to accept the terrifying truth he had just discovered. The fact that Aslan had shot him, could only mean one thing: that he was raped by that man as well. At the age of only 7 or 8. How horrible and disgusting. Swallowing hard, he shook his head slowly while muttering 

_Rape... He was just a kid... That's ... horrible... _

Eiji felt like throwing up. He tried to take a deep breath to calm himself. This at least explained why Aslan kept doubting his motives when he had agreed to help him. Why he found it so hard to trust people...

He finally leaned back from the screen, putting his arms around himself. As if putting some distance between himself and the screen could make him unsee these events. As if he could undo them. For Aslan. 

He couldn't quite explain why he was somehow drawn to Aslan. It wasn't just his good looks and his amazingly green eyes. Although the color was faint, Eiji could see what he had hidden behind those eyes, behind his intense stare. Behind his stubborn and cold attitude he saw a lonely and sad boy who was obviously hurting. His beautiful green but clouded eyes told him the truth. His eyes were overshadowed by darkness while practically screaming in pain and agony. If you had such dull eyes you had seen too much for your young age. Or experienced something that terrified you to the bone and had harmed your soul.

Eiji was running a hand through his hair, sighing dramatically. Damn. That wasn't the information he had wished to find when he had promised Aslan he'd find something out about his past... He thought he'd discover something... ordinary. Like a child who had run away from home. Or a drunk or unemployed father. Parents fighting over their kid during an ugly divorce. But never, in his wildest dreams, would he have imagined to uncover such a disgusting truth. Not only that Aslan was raped as a kid which was bad enough in itself as far as Eiji was concerned. Aslan had also shot the guy in his own home because he had seen no other option. At that young age he already had to take matters into his own hands. No one had helped him. Or protected him... Not even his own father...

How could he ever tell him something horrible like that...? The first thought that occurred to Eiji was that maybe he should keep it from Aslan... There are truths in this world that shouldn't be dug up and brought to light again. Wouldn't it be better for Aslan if he didn't know the truth? Eiji sat there for a moment thinking about it. Putting himself in Ash's shoes. Would he want to know the truth? No matter how terrifying it was? If he, like Aslan, didn't remember anything about his life in NYC? If he didn't know what had happened the last 10 years or so? Who his friends were? What had happened to his family? What kind of life he had led up until now? And especially what had happened to him that he had ended up in a coma somewhere? And why he had appeared as a ghost in the Public Library of all places? 

Eiji decided the answer to all those questions was yes. He'd want to know the truth even if it would be a bad memory. He'd still want to know the truth no matter how bad it was. It was still better than not knowing anything at all. Than being left in the dark about his past. And it wasn't Eiji's place to decide that. 

That wasn't fair to Aslan, Eiji decided. He should tell him that it's an awful memory and let him decide if he wanted to learn about it or not. Aslan had to make the choice himself. It was his life on the line after all. 

A few hours later he decided that maybe Aslan's computer could give him some clues. But as soon as the computer started up, he was asked for a password. Figures, Eiji thought. Of course, someone as suspicious as Aslan wouldn't leave his computer unprotected. He was still staring at the screen when suddenly everything went dark and someone put a hand over his mouth from behind.

Before Eiji knew what had happened to him, he was tied to a chair, his wrists bound painfully tight to the back of it. A guy with dirty blonde hair was standing in front of him, looking down with an evil scowl distorting his already unpleasant face. His men had called him Arthur.

"Hey, samurai boy. I've been following you these last few days. Let's have a little talk, you and I. About Ash Lynx.", he began, playing with his knife, twisting and turning it in a threatening way dangerously close to his face. 

Eiji looked around for a way to escape. Or someone who'd help him out of his desperate situation. Eiji was naive but he wasn't stupid. Arthur wouldn't let him go. He'd either torture or kill him. And the way it looked he enjoyed doing it. Beads of sweat were running down Eiji's forehead. There were several men standing guard, two in this room behind that man, two guarding the entrance. He could see some silhouettes in front of the window as well. In short, we was surrounded. With no means to escape. Eiji looked down at the floor, squeezing his eyes shut. 

_Please tell me this is all a dream. This can't be happening..._

But when he opened his eyes again, Arthur was still standing there, watching Eiji with a hint of amusement in his eyes. 

"Who?", Eiji asked timidly. He had heard the name before on the streets but what did that have to do with him? As far as he knew that gang leader had died several months ago... 

Without a warning, Arthur punched him, then roughly gripped his hair, so that Eiji was forced to look up at him. If Eiji's hands weren't bound to the chair he would have... Never mind. What could someone like him even do? All he could do was glare at him.

"Try again.", he asked while a wicked grin ran over his face. Apparently he was enjoying himself immensely. Eiji didn't know what to do. People had always told him that his face was as easy to read as an open book. So lying wouldn't help him. Arthur would see through that in seconds.

The real problem was that he didn't believe the truth, either. So what was he supposed to do? Still, he had to try...

"I – I've just arrived here some days ago. So I d – don't know who you're talking about.", Eiji replied, trying to sound much more confident than he was. Hoping the tremor in his voice didn't give him away. But even he could hear the stuttering and how he had mispronounced some words...

"I don't believe you.", Arthur growled at him, getting more and more impatient with every passing second. 

"Tell me where Ash Lynx is and I'll leave you alone." He grabbed his chin, forcing him to look at him. Eiji couldn't help but glare at him. 

"You see, I'm not interested in you... I want Ash Lynx! So this is your last chance.", Arthur said before he put a gun against Eiji's forehead. Eiji could practically feel how all color drained from his face when the cold metal touched his skin. He began shaking and closed his eyes while tears ran down his face.

_I'm really going to die. This is real... I'm sorry Aslan. For breaking my promise..._


	4. All The Devils Are Here

When Eiji had closed his eyes, he heard a shot ring out as he had expected. What he hadn't expected, however, was that the shot wasn't killing him. Instead, he heard some guys farther away from him go down, probably at the front door. He slowly opened his eyes again. The guys at the entrance were dead and a cursing Arthur had dropped his gun and was holding his bleeding shoulder.

In the middle of the door stood a guy with a mohawk in such a bright purple color he could easily have jumped right out of one of those Japanese anime that Eiji so loved.

"You're so damn loud, you didn't even hear your own henchmen go down. Talk about some really easy targets. And here I thought my guys could hone their skills a bit.", Shorter smirked while entering, gun still aimed at Arthur.

"Besides, we both know that thanks to Ash you can't fire a gun. If memory serves."

Then he caught Eiji staring at him, his mouth dropping open. He gave him a thumbs-up, grinning mischievously. Eiji couldn't hide a small smile. When he had envisioned his life saver he hadn't imagined a guy with a purple mohawk and sun glasses, that was for sure. Still, he was relieved because he had found some pictures of Aslan and that guy while looking through Aslan's belongings. The photos proved they were close friends so he could trust him. At least he hoped so…

"Shorter. What the fuck are you doing here?", asked Arthur, glancing at his direction and giving him a dirty look.

"Taking care of family business.", Shorter simply said, shrugging nonchalantly. Arthur would never believe that he'd save a random stranger he didn't even know. But Arthur would back off if he knew Eiji was part of the Chinese. And therefore under his protection. Besides, Arthur was way too dumb to tell the difference between Chinese and Japanese people.

"Family business?"

"Yes, he's just moved here. He works part-time at Chang Dai. And he goes to college here. You could have figured all of that out yourself by the way. The rent agreement is lying on the table over there and his suit case has an airport tag on it. There's even a date on it, you idiot. He's just arrived a week ago. So how the hell would he know Ash?"

"But – I saw him rummaging through Ash's things. And his computer."

"The landlord was just telling me that the previous tenant had died. And that I could throw away all of his stuff. While cleaning I decided to throw his stuff away but I decided I could at least take a look.", Eiji exclaimed angrily, glaring at him. It wasn't technically a lie since he had been curious and had looked at some of his belongings while tidying up the apartment. "How is that a reason to shoot someone?"

"Ash died three months ago. When will you finally get that? You finally got what you wanted. The guy you hated the most is gone. Problem solved, go home." Shorter told him, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Then how did you get here so fast? Did you watch the apartment?", Arthur inquired doubtfully.

Shorter looked at him, giving him a disappointed look. "I didn't watch this apartment. I watched you, you dumbass. And the mere fact that you haven't even noticed you were being watched is proof enough that you can never rule over Ash's territory." Arthur scowled at him and tried to cover up his surprise. Yet, Eiji had seen it. As had Shorter since he threw a mocking glance Arthur's way.

"Then why has his gang not fallen apart?", Arthur asked defensively, suspicion all over his face. He didn't believe a word that Shorter was saying. Shorter knew it, too. He sighed dramatically before continuing.

"Because unlike you Ash was a true leader and a genius. He had foreseen his death and had given his gang orders in case he would die. He had also picked a new leader and had instructed him beforehand. So his second in command took over his gang. Simple as that.", Shorter explained in a bored tone, looking at him as if Arthur was a complete moron and could have figured something that obvious out on his own.

"So stop wasting my time and untie him or I'll shoot you. I may not be as good as Ash had been, but I'll make sure to hit something vital this time. And tell your gang to leave Eiji alone. I'll be watching you.", he warned him in a cold and commanding tone.

Practically hissing at him, Arthur untied Eiji who was rubbing his hurting wrists instantly.

"We'll see each other sooner than you think.", he threatened Eiji before leaving. At the last second, Shorter saw that one of Arthur's injured men had picked up Arthur's gun and was about to fire some bullets at their direction.

"Get down! Now, Eiji!", Shorter cried out at him and threw them both to the floor. Eiji was relieved Shorter had done that since he would have reacted much too late since he had frozen up at Shorter's words for just a moment. That moment could have killed him.

"Fuck, when will I ever learn to shoot at the damn head?", Shorter muttered to himself, getting up from the floor before helping Eiji up, too. Eiji had frozen up, rooted to the spot while he had pressed his arms around himself shivering. He felt how someone gently shoved him to the sofa in the other room and waved with his fingers in front of his face.

"Eiji? Everything's fine, ok? You're safe.", someone told him, gripping his shoulders. Eiji wanted to say something but his voice failed him. He just kept staring blankly at the five bodies lying in the other room. He breathed in too short gasps and tears pricked at his eyes.

"What am I gonna do now?", Eiji choked out. "I have several dead bodies lying around in my apartment, there's blood everywhere and bullet holes in my walls. What if anyone called the police? They'll arrest me on the spot.", he stammered and his body started trembling even more while he covered his tear-streaked face with his hands. "I'll go to jail. And if I don't go to jail, Arthur will kill me." He couldn't help that tears streamed down his face. This wasn't how he had imagined the fresh start in New York.

Shorter sat next to him and gently put an arm around his shoulder. "Don't worry, I'll take care of the bodies , the blood and the bullets. And in this part of town no one ever calls the police.", he explained to him, waiting for him to calm down. Eiji calmed down a bit and wiped his cheeks with his sleeve.

"Thank you for saving me.", Eiji said, looking at him gratefully while color gradually returned to his face. "I'm Eiji – wait, how did you even know my name?", he asked, still trembling a bit.

"It's fine. I can't stand Arthur. And your name is on your rental agreement."

Eiji nodded quietly, trying to work up the courage to ask what this attack was all about. He wasn't sure he wanted to know the answers. Still, he rather heard uncomfortable answers than being left in the dark forever. He wiped his clammy hands at his jeans, then looked at him with newly awoken determination. To be honest, he was scared to death. At the moment, his anger and frustration won out, though. He only wanted to know that in the world had led to this almost deadly attack. And he knew the only one who held all the answers to that mystery was Shorter.

"So, when are you going to tell me what is going on here? Who is Arthur? What's the Chang something I'm supposed to work at? Why did you tell Arthur I belong to the Chinese? What does that mean? And who is Ash? And how do you fit into all of this? How could you save me at the last minute? Were you watching Arthur? Or me? And why? And why did I you save me? Why are armed guys attacking me? Will you answer my questions or do I have to wait until someone else tries to shoot me?", Eiji rambled on without catching his breath, his huge brown eyes boring into Shorter.

"So you want answers.", Shorter just said, smirking at him.

Eiji just rolled his eyes at him.

Shorter stared at Eiji, then burst out laughing. "I like you, Eiji. So before I answer your questions, let me tell you something important. It could save your life."

Eiji looked at him curiously. He might have acted as if this was a joke to him. Even so, he was terrified because he had no idea what was going on. He felt like the innocent bystander in a movie that somehow ended up in a huge conspiracy that was way out of his league. Shorter had apparently seen that as well because he continued in a more serious tone.

"Eiji, you seem like a really nice guy. But you obviously don't belong in this world."

"A world where people have purple mohawks?", Eiji asked, smiling faintly.

Shorter grinned at him, but after a moment he got serious again.

"A world where people's lives mean nothing. Eiji, the world Ash and I belong to is cruel and dangerous. That's why I'm going to tell you the following: Please stay out of it. Stop finding out things about your previous tenant. He belongs to a cruel and sinister world you can't even begin to imagine. If you research more about him, you'll get dragged into some things you don't want to be part of. This isn't an episode of CSI New York. This is real life. You could end up dying. I'm serious here!", Shorter exclaimed in frustration when Eiji looked at him, completely unimpressed.

Eiji knew that the situation was dangerous. Still, how could he be expected to just agree obediently without knowing the details? He had made a promise with Aslan and he intended to keep that. He didn't know yet how he fit into all of this but he intended to find out. He didn't want to drown in self pity anymore. He had a new start here and he wouldn't quit. He couldn't let him down. And he wanted to see how everything unfolded in front of him with his own eyes. Even if it was dangerous.

"Thank you for worrying about me but I can't give up so easily. I came here for a new start. So, before I listen to your advice, I need to know the details. After all that happened I deserve to know.", he tried to explain his reasoning while his brown eyes bored into Shorter's with new resolve reflected in his eyes. Shorter didn't like his answer and just shook his head in disbelief. Still, he looked at him in resignation.

"Eiji, I promise I'll answer all of your questions and explain some things you have to know if you want to survive here. But not here.", he told him while he motioned to him to be quiet while he checked all the rooms for any kind of cameras or bugging devices. In a matter of minutes he had found them and had crushed them with his shoe.

"Let's go somewhere else."


	5. A Shade Of Truth

_That wasn't how I had imagined my new start at all. _

In Japan, everyone had warned him that America and especially New York was dangerous and that the people there were impolite, disrespectful and egotistical. Eiji had always assumed they had exaggerated. No one in his little town had ever been to New York, after all. They all had their so-called wisdom from the internet or worse, from TV series and movies.

Ibe had warned him that there were dangerous quarters that he should stay away from. Apart from that, New York was like any other major city. It was crowded and had their pickpockets at famous tourist spots but was generally a safe place as long as you didn't wander through dark alleys alone at the dead of night. He had assumed that New York was like Tokyo. And he'd often been to Tokyo, which was the most populated city in the world and far larger than New York. Going to New York would be a piece of cake, right? At least that's how he had imagined it before he was attacked in his own apartment.

Eiji was aware that he looked innocent and naive and had to admit after the recent events that his way of thinking was a bit too simple-minded and way too trusting and sincere for a city like New York. He couldn't help it; he came from a little and peaceful town by the sea where people helped each other out, and danger and crime were practically non-existent.

But never in his life had he imagined that he would be threatened, questioned and nearly shot in his apartment just because of the person living there before him. When he had agreed to help Aslan, he hadn't known what he had gotten himself into. He had assumed that Aslan had been injured in some accident or was some student with a traumatic past or abusive parents.

After some guy with a purple mohawk named Shorter had saved him at the last second and he had ended up with several dead people lying in a pool of blood in his bedroom, he had reacted like any other ordinary person from a sheltered neighborhood - he had panicked and had broken down crying. Only then had he realized that this was really happening, that this wasn't a dream he would wake up from. This wasn't an episode of CSI New York. The blood, the bullet holes in his walls, the dead bodies in his apartment, and the guns, knives, and other weapons strewn across the floor were all real. After Shorter had helped him to calm down, Shorter had promised him he would take care of his apartment. Eiji didn't care what exactly he would do, and he assumed it was better if he didn't know.

Maybe it was too naive to trust Shorter. First, he looked like Japanese people imagined a gang leader to look like: tattoos, piercings and hair in a color so bright he looked like an anime character.

Second, he didn't even know him. He had only recognized him from some photos he had found in Aslan's belongings where he was standing beside him. They seemed like good friends, but the pictures were several years old since Ash looked about 15 in them.

Still, the fact remained that Shorter had saved his life. So he decided to trust him because he was the only one who could shed some light on the recent events. If he had to die one way or another, eventually, he at least wanted to learn the reason behind these current events.

After nearly dying, he had decided that he deserved some answers. He hadn't understood a word when Shorter and Arthur had hurled insults at each other. Not only had their English been much too fast for him, but the slang words they had used wasn't exactly the kind of vocabulary you learned at school. Furthermore, he had no idea who that Ash person was they had been talking about all the time, how that Arthur guy was connected to all of this, and why he had even attacked him.

Shorter had seen that Eiji wouldn't give up so easily, so he had brought him to the restaurant called Chang Dai, his sister Nadia owned. It was a small but nice restaurant with Chinese lamps hanging from the ceiling. The walls were covered with photos of Chinese food, landscapes and her family. On the left side, wooden tables and red banks were set up for customers. A counter with some bar stools placed in front of it was occupying most of the space on the right side. Eiji could see that there was a kitchen behind the counter. Shorter had led Eiji to a table at the back of the restaurant because he wanted to talk to him without anyone overhearing their conversation.

After Shorter had explained to his sister that Eiji had nearly been killed just because he had moved into Ash's old apartment, Nadia's stoic features had softened, and she had handed Eiji some ice for his cheek and had served them some snacks before leaving them alone. Nadia was rough around the edges but had a good heart.

Even Eiji had heard rumors that she cared for all the kids in her neighborhood, often handed them leftovers from her restaurant, watched out for them, and protected them, or sheltered them if necessary. Eiji was an excellent observer, so he noticed instantly that she didn't agree with Shorter's decision to become a gang leader. Still, it had been apparent that Nadia loved Shorter and would do anything for him.

So here he was sitting in a Chinese restaurant late at night with a guy he knew nothing about in the worst part of the city. Even so, Eiji wanted to know what in the world was going on here. Shorter was probably right that he didn't belong in this world and should move away. Moving away, however, was not an option for Eiji since he couldn't find another apartment this cheap. And it didn't guarantee that Arthur wouldn't bother him anymore. Arthur was vicious and evil, who enjoyed killing and hurting people. Eiji had seen it in his cold and cruel eyes, devoid of any emotion. So maybe Arthur would try again if Shorter wasn't around. Therefore, the only safe option was to learn what had provoked the attack on his apartment and to learn from it. Learn to survive in this world.

Shorter had first spelled out some basic rules of survival to him. He had also clarified that he had informed Arthur that Eiji was part of his gang to protect him. Gang members were looking out for each other and would protect him. Like a big family. He made is also clear that Arthur was someone he should try to avoid at all costs and that he was from an opposing gang and his arch-enemy.

Then Shorter had shown him a photo of Aslan and him leaning against the wall of an abandoned building that he had saved on his phone, explaining to him that they had been best friends.

"You wanted to know who Ash is. This is a photo of him. He was – "

"That's not Ash, that's Aslan Jade Callenreese.", Eiji suddenly blurted out, interrupting him. Shorter's eyes widened in surprise as he stared at Eiji.

"Yeah, that's his real name. Ash is his nickname. Ash Lynx. But how can you even know his real name? Especially if you've never met him before? No one knows it. Not in New York, at least. Especially not his middle name. The only reason how you could have known that – "

"...is if I've met him.", Eiji finished for him. "I know you don't believe me yet, but I'll explain that to you later in more detail, I promise." Shorter cast him a questioning look, then slowly nodded and continued with his explanation that Aslan Jade Callenreese and the notorious but officially dead Ash Lynx were the same person. Shorter described Aslan's background to him and how that led to him being dead now.

Shorter had only told him the rough or censored version, Eiji had noticed that at once. Still, he hadn't pushed him for more details because it had been apparent he had done so to protect him.

Eiji did some quick research on his cell phone while Shorter was talking to Nadia and was shocked to learn Aslan or "Ash Lynx" had been the most dangerous gang leader here, cold-blooded, lethal and vicious. A monster, a killer, a demon. That's what the newspapers had called him. He had never expected that he dealt with one of the most dangerous people in New York, someone who ruled the underworld of the city with an iron fist. As a teenager, no less. But it explained the dangerous aura that had surrounded him.

He had heard those same terms describing Ash on the streets. Shorter, however, had never used these words to describe Ash. When realizing that, Eiji had been relieved because it proved to Eiji that they had been good friends.

When Shorter returned with some drinks and continued, Shorter still insisted that Aslan was dead, though. Eiji wondered why he would lie about that. Shorter was a gang leader, so of course, he didn't tell a newbie like him everything. Yet, what he had told him had all been true. Eiji had seen it in his eyes ever since he had hooked the sunglasses onto his shirt. Ash was probably his closest friend, so why would he lie about that? To protect him?

He had seen their close friendship in the photos he had found in Aslan's belongings. In some of them, Aslan had worn Shorter's sunglasses, and in others, Shorter had worn a hoody that obviously belonged to Ash because it was too big for him. Since he insisted his friend was dead and Eiji couldn't see a reason behind this strange behavior, he just decided to confront Shorter.

"You're lying.", Eiji accused him bluntly. "I can see it in your eyes and in the way you talk about him. If Ash is dead, why do you talk about him in present tense? You told me The world Ash and I belong to

_is_ cruel and dangerous. He _belongs_ to a cruel and sinister world you can't even begin to imagine. If someone has been dead for three months, you don't speak about him this way. Unless he isn't dead, but you just want people to believe that.", he concluded, staring intently at him.

"My English might not be that great, but it's good enough to notice that.", Eiji exclaimed stubbornly when Shorter nearly choked on his drink.

Shorter just stared at him and looked carefully around if someone had overheard their conversation. He had realized while looking at Eiji's honest face that Eiji wasn't just guessing or bluffing, but that he knew for sure that Ash was alive. Eiji was pretty good at reading facial expressions and look behind poker faces. So he saw Shorter's surprise flickering in his eyes for a fraction of a second before he tried to cover it up. So he waited expectantly for an answer.

When Shorter didn't say anything, Eiji abruptly got up.

"I know I look like a kid and have an innocent face. Still, that doesn't mean I'm dumb.", Eiji said, anger and disappointment flashing in his eyes. "If you brought me here to lie to me, I'm leaving. After I thank your sister for the ice, of course."

Eiji grabbed his jacket and tried to leave. Shorter grabbed his hand at the last second and stopped him, explaining to him that he wanted to learn one or two things about him before giving him more information.

Eiji hesitated for a moment, then reluctantly sat down again, understanding his reasoning. So he patiently explained to him why he came to New York and how he had ended up in Ash's apartment, assuring him that renting this apartment had been a mere coincidence. He elaborated further that he got into college at very short notice, and all rooms on campus had already been occupied. That this apartment was one of the few he had been able to afford and which was available immediately.

When Shorter still hesitated, he reminded him that he knew Ash's full name and asked him how he could have learned it. Shorter admitted that he couldn't figure that one out. Since Eiji thought that Shorter wouldn't believe his ghost story without some more proof that he had really met Aslan, Eiji described Ash. Every little detail he remembered. When Eiji had finished with the description of his clothes, his physical appearance, and his personality, Shorter smiled sadly at him.

"You're the first person who described Ash as a human being and not as a monster. If people described Ash to me, they have never used the words _lonely__,_ _sad_ and _suspicious_ or _suffering from a bad experience _but_ vicious__,__ monste__r__ and merciless killer__._

Eiji returned the smile and relaxed a little. "I don't know much about him; I'm aware of that.", Eiji replied. "Even so, I'm good at reading faces, and I can see emotions behind stoic expressions because I'm emphatic. So I notice emotions other people can't see. Ash has probably experienced something horrible because there must be a reason for his distrust and suspicion.", he explained while his eyes softened. Shorter cared for his best friend, that much was obvious.

"Still, I've looked into his eyes, and I've spoken to him. He doesn't look like an ice-cold killer.

I mean, that's the mask he wants everyone to see because it hides his real emotions. Behind that mask, however, is a hurting teenager that had probably gone through a lot. His green eyes looked sad and lonely, and behind his mask and in the depth of his eyes lingered kindness and goodness. It was hard to notice, but it was there. You probably accuse me now of being too naive and trusting, but I know what I saw.", Eiji insisted stubbornly. "I'm a good judge in character, and Ash is a good person, no matter what everyone else says."

"Thank you, Eiji. For seeing more than a cold-blooded killer in Ash. There's really much more to him, and it says so much about you that you're still sitting here after I've told you the truth about Ash and his past. Ash is a great guy, but he had a horrible upbringing and has suffered through a lot, exactly as you've told me. But what I don't get is how someone like you would ever meet someone like Ash. You come from entirely different worlds. Worlds that should never cross each other."

"I've studied at the Public Library. The Rose Reading Room, to be more precise.", Eiji explained. "I've heard rumors that it's cursed and got curious. Since it was close to where I work, I checked it out."

"I guess you won't believe the rest...", Eiji said timidly. "You'd think I'm crazy...", he added quietly, nervously running a hand through his hair.

"Now you've got my full attention. Go on.", Shorter laughed. "And if you knew me any better, you wouldn't have said that. Ash always made fun of me because I believed the craziest stories. Or made them up myself." Eiji smiled faintly at that, relief crossing over his face. Maybe if he was as open-minded as him, he would be able to see Aslan's ghost as well. He sighed dramatically before continuing.

"I saw him yesterday... at the Rose Reading Room.", Eiji admitted, avoiding his gaze. Instead, he looked down at the food that Nadia had placed in front of him several minutes ago.

"So you want me to believe you saw Ash..." Shorter scrutinized Eiji's face. "You're not lying. I don't think you are even capable of lying. Has anyone ever told you that you have absolutely no poker face?"

"Yes, I hear that all the time.", Eiji complained, glaring at him.

"So, what exactly did you see?"

"A ... ghost. Or something similar. I talked to him, and he told me he wasn't dead but in a coma in some hospital."

Shorter burst out laughing. "That's hilarious. That could be a story I would have made up. I give you 100 points for creativity. A ghost... Priceless..."

"What if I tell you something else, something not many people know?", he asked curiously. "I've noticed one other thing about him. And he had told me one other thing about himself not many people know."

"Ok, you've described Ash really well, I'll give you that. And some of those details wouldn't have been possible if you hadn't met him. And I admit that I can't find a reason how you could ever have learned of his middle name.", Shorter admitted quietly. Then his eyes lit up, and he grinned mischievously.

"Ok, let's make a bet, Eiji. If one of those two things you've just mentioned is something most people don't know, I'll believe you and will do whatever it is you want me to do."

"Really?", Eiji asked, pure happiness reflected in his brown eyes. "If I win, I want you to come to the library with me. To see Ash for yourself. And maybe talk to him. Or at least try."

"Ok, I promise, I'll do it if you win the bet.", Shorter assured him.

"Ok, one is that he is far-sighted. He needs glasses if he wants to read something close. Like a book or look at some photos. I noticed when he looked at the photos I took. He squinted his eyes to get a better look and then moved farther away to see them more clearly. And the other one is that I know his birthday.", Eiji explained honestly to Shorter.

Shorter nodded. "Okay, I surrender. You win. That information is pretty unknown. The only place he wears glasses is at the library or in front of a computer. If you also know his birthday, I'm convinced you have met him. And I'll go to the library with you. I don't believe you entirely. Yet, I know you're not lying, and I can't explain where you would find such personal info about Ash within a week.", he explained honestly.

"You do?" Eiji beamed at him. "His birthday is on August 12th."

He had hoped that Shorter would see Ash for himself. If they were as good friends as Shorter had said, Ash would probably remember something about his life in New York. Before that, he had to talk to Ash and tell him that he'd bring someone with him the next time. Someone as suspicious as Ash would probably disappear through a wall or make himself Invisible if Shorter came with him without warning. He didn't remember him yet, which reminded Eiji that Shorter hadn't learned the most critical issue yet.

"Let me speak to him first.", Eiji said quietly. "Because there's something I haven't told you yet."

"Which is?", Shorter asked suspiciously.

"He doesn't remember anything from his time in New York. He – "

Shorter interrupted him suddenly, his eyes burning as if on fire. He abruptly gripped both of Eiji's shoulders before looking directly at Eiji.

"You mean that idiot doesn't remember me?", he exclaimed furiously.

"At all? After all, we've gone through?"


	6. Maybe The Truth Will Set You Free?

_I knew he wouldn't come back here._

Ash watched the students in the library while pacing the room. He could walk or sit on a chair like any average person if he focused hard enough. If he didn't, he ended up floating in the air again. Since he had nothing else to do, he had tried out some of his new talents like passing through walls, creating winds and moving objects. By now, he had discovered that going through walls only worked on the second floor and only next to the Rose Reading Room, so there had to be some connection or attachment to that room. He could move objects not only with a swift motion of his hands but also with his mind by now but still wasn't able to touch them.

Pretty inconvenient if you needed to research your past in New York but couldn't turn the page of a newspaper or switch on a computer. Or maybe he hadn't mastered his powers completely. Perhaps it was like in the movies, and you got stronger and discovered new abilities with each passing day?

However, this wasn't a movie, and he had not much time left. He could feel it. The connection to his body was getting fainter each day. He wished he could do what the students did. Switch on a computer, enter keywords into a search engine and just find answers. Watching all those students do that so easily just made him angry and frustrated. And to top it all off, he had noticed that if he came near any technical devices, they went haywire and began to flicker and then went dead.

So, in the end, he had no other choice than to hope that Eiji kept his word and would help him. But would he return here just to see him? He had no reason to. They had only met each other, after all. Why would he even bother?

Before Eiji had come along, he had practically given up and had been drowning in despair because no one had been able to see him. Yet, the worst part had been when realizing that he was powerless. Researching your past was pointless if you couldn't touch a book, a computer, a keyboard or a touchscreen. It had frustrated him to the extent that he had drowned in self-pity and had just waited for his death because what else could he have done? Asking someone else for help when you were invisible would make no sense. Besides, it was impossible without remembering anyone from your life in New York. Ash sighed deeply and looked out of the window, watching all the people coming and going. It was impossible to make out one person from the second floor in such a huge crowd, though, so he gave up after a while.

Eiji had promised him that he would be back today. He didn't know why he had even believed him in the first place. Yet, Eiji had just radiated so much honesty and innocence that he had eventually accepted he really wanted to help him.

There had been something about him that had put him at ease. He had possessed the warmest and clearest eyes he had ever seen. And his smile hadn't been fake like the one most people wore around here. It had been genuine and had even reached his chocolate brown eyes. And he had had absolutely no poker face. All his emotions had been clearly visible on his face. The fact that Eiji hadn't even tried to hide them had been so refreshing that he had lowered his guard more and more while talking to him.

He still wondered why Eiji had seen him? Why him of all people? What made him special? Maybe he was just more open to supernatural matters as he had told him? Or perhaps he just felt emotions surrounding him more intensely than others?

Or was there more to it?

Seeing Eiji's innocent expression, he had immediately felt better and had gained new hope that he could remember who he was and would get out of this dire situation. Change his fate for the better.

Yet, he still had remaining doubts. People as good as Eiji didn't exist, right? It was too good to be true. Wishful thinking. Still, his warm eyes full of compassion and sincerity reminded him of Griff, his older brother. He wished he knew what had happened to him...

Eiji was his last chance. His faint glimmer of hope. He clenched his fists while his eyes kept staring at the entrance to this room, his intense glare burning holes through the door. Patience wasn't exactly his strong suit. If Eiji didn't come and help him, all he could do was wait for his death...

_I'm probably not a person as good as you are. But please keep your promise. You're my last chance... The only one who can save me..._

While Ash watched the door closely, his thoughts went back to the moment he had met Eiji. When seeing Eiji for the first time, Ash wasn't impressed. Eiji looked like a 12-year-old, and his English was a disaster. There was nothing remarkable or interesting about him, nothing that caught your eye. He looked ordinary, plain and had a face like everyone else in Chinatown. But when you watched him more closely, he was completely different at the same time. He radiated honesty and innocence that was so refreshing but stupid at the same time.

So his first thoughts when seeing him had been:

_What a freak._

However, it had impressed him that he had been incapable of driving Eiji away. Apart from the fact that he could actually see him, he had also never been scared of him. Most people were afraid of ghosts, weren't they? They would scream or run away.

Eiji had just continued talking to him as if meeting ghosts was an everyday occurrence for him. Nothing special. He had tried everything from a death glare to rude outbursts, but Eiji had only crossed his arms and had glared right back at him, stubbornly insisting that he was the only one who could see him, and he was his only choice.

Eiji had just explained to him that he reminded him of a folk tale they had in Japan about a demigod called Ashura. Those creatures were often used to describe a person who fell into a situation where they have to fight an endless battle against something in a relentless and inhumane manner. According to Eiji, Ashuras are incredibly beautiful like him and live in one of the six worlds of hell, governed only by anger and pain, fighting for victory forever.

Eiji had told him that he also looked as if he had fought an endless battle, and he could see the pain and suffering in his eyes as well as in his body language. At the same time, he had insisted that he had seen a lost but kind soul in him. Eiji's words had felt sincere and had comforted him. Ash also saw the truth in Eiji's soft gaze. So he had eventually warmed up to him. Eiji gave him the feeling that he wasn't alone anymore.

Still, judging from the few memories and flashbacks he had seen, he doubted he even had a soul. There were people in his flashbacks calling him a vicious monster, a devil and a ruthless killing machine. And when he had seen how easily he had killed another person with that dangerous and cold glint in his eyes, they had probably been right.

So hearing Eiji's kind words and seeing him smile at him encouragingly had healed his heart. He had even dared to hope that maybe he would find out the truth and survive all of this. And even if he didn't survive, he wanted to know the truth before dying. Who he was, what he had done, and how he had ended up in a coma.

But looking back, he wondered if it had been a mistake to trust him. What if he used that information to hurt him? And what if he even found the hospital he was treated and would kill him or tell someone else to do it? What had he done? Ash put a hand across his face and sighed deeply. He was a complete moron.

Logically speaking, he had trusted and given important information to a guy he knew nothing about. And why? Just because he had an angelic face? Because he looked like a grade-schooler? Why had he lowered his guard around him so easily? Had he lost his mind? He didn't even know where in Japan he came from or knew anything about his past or his background.

He knew absolutely nothing about Eiji, unlike Eiji, who had so much info about him that he could find him and kill him in the blink of an eye. He was in a coma and, therefore, utterly defenseless. Killing him would be easier than taking candy from a baby.

Someone like Eiji was too honest and innocent. Pure people like him didn't exist. This wasn't a damn fairy tale. He was probably a spy, a noisy journalist or had some other ulterior motive.

While talking to him, he even told him his full name and his birth date and gave him more information about himself than he had initially intended. Fuck. Eiji looked so naive and innocent; it was suspicious. Meeting him had to be a trap. It could have been arranged. Maybe he was someone who wanted him to lose his guard and trust him.

If that had been their goal, they had certainly succeeded. He couldn't believe he had trusted him. He slowly started to panic. He didn't know why anyone would kill him, but he had some flashbacks where he had killed people without hesitating. And where people had tried to kill him. So he wasn't exactly a saint and probably deserved his fate...

"Aslan?"

Ash instantly woke up from his daydreaming and overthinking. He had been so deep in thought that he hadn't even noticed how the door had opened. That warm voice... It put him out of his dark thoughts instantly like a light in a sea of darkness and confusion. He had really come back for him... Eiji... Maybe good things happened even to him once in a while.

He slowly turned around. Eiji had already put his camera on the same table he sat the last time and rummaged through his bag. Ash couldn't believe it. He had kept his promise. But why didn't he look at him and avoided his gaze? He inspected him more closely, suddenly worried.

The look in his eyes was different this time. Sad. There was a darkness in his eyes that hadn't been there before and that Ash didn't like. And his honest eyes reflected pain and... was that guilt? He was trembling slightly while he was holding a folder to his chest a bit too tightly. And his eyes were still downcast at the table in front of him.

_That's probably the moment he tells me that he can't help me any longer. Or, even worse, that he has used me and betrayed me..._

After Eiji had put the folder down, Eiji's hands clenched into fists. After a moment, he found new resolve, then slowly looked up at him. He was nervous, and there were dark circles under his bloodshot eyes as if he hadn't slept in days. When Ash scrutinized his face more closely, he suddenly noticed a deep cut on his forehead and a purple bruise on his cheek that hadn't been there before. Eiji had tried to hide the cut with some brown strands covering it up, but he couldn't fool Ash.

At that moment, he forgot all his paranoia and was genuinely worried. Was he the reason that Eiji had been injured? Because he had tried to investigate what had happened to him? Or was that a coincidence? Yeah, right. As if coincidences like that were possible. Who was thinking in too simple terms now?

"Eiji, what the hell happened to you? You look awful. Does that have something to do with me? With your investigation about me? I shouldn't have involved you in all of this..."Ash told him guiltily, avoiding his gaze. "I'm sorry." Then he looked at him again and moved closer.

Without thinking, he touched Eiji's forehead. Eiji was completely surprised, and his eyes widened. Still, he didn't flinch. He just groaned in pain. Of course, Ash's hand went through him, but there was a weird sensation between them. Like little electric sparks flying between them. When Ash's hand went through Eiji, it felt like snowflakes falling on his skin. Or whatever ghosts had.

That simple gesture had aroused a bad feeling in him. A short flicker of a memory he couldn't make any sense of had rushed through his mind. He saw people grabbing his wrists, holding him down, a vicious glint full of lust in their dark eyes. They way they touched him was rough and painful.

A feeling of immense pain and fear overwhelmed him. It made him nauseous and sick to his stomach. Without knowing the reason, he felt pure disgust. He felt dirty and filthy and instantly regretted touching Eiji. His touch had probably hurt him... Ash abruptly pulled his hand back, practically flinching as if burnt.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have - "

"It's fine. It felt strange but in a good way. My cut felt better for a moment. Like a soft and cool summer breeze touching it, followed by rainbow bubbles touching my skin and bursting.

Ash stared at him in surprise. "That's what it felt to me, too. Only the way you described it was much better." A small smile escaped his lips.

"And you just did it because you were worried and instinctively wanted to help me, right?", Eiji asked honestly.

Ash looked sadly at him. "I forgot that I can't touch you. That I'm a ghost.", he said, looking down at the floor. He couldn't protect Eiji in his pathetic state. What would happen if he was caught up in a dangerous situation because of him? He couldn't remember much of his life, after all. Maybe it was too late already...

"You're not a ghost, Aslan. You're a lost soul who wants to find out how he ended up in a coma.", Eiji told him while reaching for his hand. Ash pulled his hand back and immediately regretted it when he saw Eiji's face. He looked sad and seriously hurt.

"I'm sorry, Eiji. I have seen some bad memories about people touching me. I don't understand them since they have a lot of holes. But..."

Eiji's eyes softened instantly as he looked at him while pure relief brightened his eyes again. He nodded at him, signaling him that he understood his reaction now.

"But what happened, Eiji?"

Eiji sighed dramatically. "It's a long story. Is there a place where we, or should I rather say I, won't be overheard?", he asked him. Ash smiled and led him to a small corner with a single table next to a bookshelf. "This bookshelf is haunted. No one comes close to it.", he said, smirking at him after Eiji had put all of his things on the other table.

"So, let me say two things at the beginning.", Eiji started. "First, I won't break my promise to help you, no matter what I'm going to tell you now. Second, I have dug out some events about your past. Some of them are horrible and disgusting. To be honest, I wanted to keep them to myself at first.", Eiji admitted honestly, looking directly into his eyes. Ash met his gaze but had no clue what he was talking about.

What did he mean by that? And what did he mean by horrible and disgusting? Surely, Eiji was exaggerating, right? He came from a peaceful world and had led a sheltered life with loving parents. So, the information he had found was probably not as awful as Eiji had described it. Not to him. At least, he hoped so... Eiji started speaking again, pulling him out of his thoughts. He grew more nervous with every word, fumbling with the sleeves of his hoodie all the time.

"I realized later on that keeping the truth from you wouldn't be fair to you. This is about your life, Aslan, so it should be your choice. If I were you and only remembered a tiny fraction of my life, I'd still want to know. So I'll leave that decision up to you if remembering something terrifying and evil is better than not remembering anything at all."

Ash's eyes tightened, and his eyebrows furrowed. "What do you mean by that?"

"I mean, you have experienced some dark and twisted things, and you have to decide if you want to learn them. Maybe there's a reason your mind doesn't want them to remember...", Eiji elaborated further, avoiding his gaze.

"Such as?", Ash pushed him forward. He didn't have time for Eiji's politeness. He was slowly dying and couldn't waste the time he had left with whitewashing matters. He needed to know the truth to save himself. Then Eiji's gaze met his, and he said three words that should be censored in Eiji's innocent mind.

"Abuse. Rape. Murder."

Ash just stared at him wide-eyed, totally caught off guard by that.

"Please tell me you're joking."

Eiji didn't say anything and just looked at him in this honest way he had while pure compassion was reflected in his eyes. Ash knew instantly that Eiji was dead serious. Usually, Eiji was not that blunt. He was more the quiet and polite one. If he used direct words like that, he needed him to see the gravity of the situation. Shit.

One part of him screamed that it was better not to know the truth. That sometimes, ignorance was bliss. Yet, at the same time, he hated the feeling that he had lost control over his life. He only remembered a small fraction of his memories, after all.

He realized that Eiji was right, and there was a reason his mind had suppressed the rest of his memories. Probably because his mind couldn't handle them. Or desperately wanted to forget them. Or protect him from those memories. It was also part of the reason he wouldn't wake up from the coma.

Still, he wanted to regain his memories, and Eiji had found something vital. And maybe he could find out why he was in a coma and what had happened before that if he regained his memories... He looked at Eiji again and sighed deeply.

"Tell me what you have found out. Maybe if I know the truth about my past, I can remember the present as well."

Eiji nodded in understanding and began by showing him a picture of the house and the letters he had found in which Griffin had talked about their dad and the army.

"Where the fuck did you find those?", Ash suddenly burst out. "The only one who knows about that house and the letters Griff sent to me is myself. And Griff. And his letters wouldn't miraculously turn up on the internet.", Ash cried out furiously. He eyed him suspiciously, green eyes burning wildly. "How did you get those?"

"Aslan, calm down. There's a simple explanation for that. I forgot to tell you the most important thing.", Eiji apologized at once. "You don't remember the little apartment you had? Here in New York, I mean?"

Ash shook his head but still looked at him with pure suspicion on his features. His eyes had darkened, and there was a dangerous glint in his eyes as he stood there with crossed arms.

"Most people know you won't come back anytime soon. Rumor has it that you're dead. That's what everyone believes, at least. So your apartment was given to someone else. And the one who rented it was me.", Eiji explained calmly while looking into his eyes to reassure him. Eiji had to have seen the doubt in his eyes because he pulled a document out of his folder and laid it on the table. It was a lease agreement for Eiji Okumura. The last tenant was listed as well.

"Aslan Jade Callenreese.", Ash read aloud. "So you live in my apartment now?", Ash asked, his posture relaxing again.

"Yes, it was pure coincidence. The apartment was pretty cheap and not in the best neighborhood. Anyway, that's where I found the photo. And the letters. They were hidden beneath some floorboards in the apartment."

"Strange coincidence.", he said suspiciously. Yet, he could see that Eiji was telling the truth, so he calmed down again. The least he could do was hear Eiji out, especially after he had made an effort and had investigated for him.

"It wasn't a coincidence. It was fate. We were meant to meet here. And that only I can see you isn't chance, either.", Eiji said in a firm voice, radiating confidence.

He steadfast believed in that. Ash saw it in his smiling eyes. He reluctantly nodded. He didn't believe in superstitious stuff like that, but if he told Eiji that, he would get mad again. And maybe he'd change his mind to help him.

"I know that my dad was the worst and that Griffin went to the army and often wrote me letters. But that's all I remember."

"Do you remember that you played baseball in a kid's team?", Eiji asked, showing him the photo where he was standing in a baseball uniform next to Griffin. Ash nodded, half-smiling while looking at the picture for a long time.

"I remember the photo. And that I played baseball in some kids' team, yeah. But why do you ask me about that?", he inquired curiously.

Eiji had made a copy of most of the information he wanted Ash to look at. He took an article and showed it to Ash. "Read this. It's an article about the so-called Bluebird of Cape Cod. Ash bent down and read the article Eiji had put on the table in front of him.

"He raped children and then murdered them? That's horrible, but I don't see what that's got to do with me.", Ash asked him curiously. "Wait, wasn't that guy in the article my baseball coach?"

"You're right, that's him. Most of the kids he raped lived in the neighborhood or were part of the kids' team he trained. You were also one of the kids he raped. And not once but repeatedly."

A memory suddenly flashed through his mind. He as a scared kid. A shirt that had been ripped open. A gun in his hands. A shot ringing out. Bang. Blood splatters everywhere. On his clothes, his hands, the walls, the bed. If he weren't a ghost, he would probably have fainted or stumbled backward. He stared at his hands in disbelief as if seeing them for the first time. Only they were dripping with blood this time.

His memories of that horrible day suddenly came back, rushing through his mind at a lightning-fast speed. It took him a moment to make sense of all the pictures in his head. Still, he remembered now. How he had taken his father's gun. How that man wanted to hurt him again. Pushing him onto the bed, ripping open his shirt with a devilish look in his eyes. Then, suddenly, a deafeningly loud shot echoed through the room. The man's eyes widening in surprise as he was falling, thrown back by the bullet hitting him.

He remembered how scared he had been and how his whole body had trembled. He had stared at the man with his huge eyes wide open, then had dropped the gun. There were tears in his eyes as he cried afterward because he had felt nothing. No guilt, no regret, no relief that everything was over. Only emptiness.

"I - It was me who shot him, right?", Ash asked, his voice barely a whisper.

Eiji nodded sadly. "Yes. After you had shot him, the police found the other bodies. He had buried them in his backyard. There were dozens of them. Dozens of raped, killed and buried children.", Eiji elaborated further, never stopping to look at his eyes.

"Since you've been a child, at the time, there was no trial. But from the comments about the story, it was obvious that everyone knew you were the one who had shot him. Cape Cod is a small town. Everyone knows each other. That's probably the reason you left Cape Cod. And how you eventually ended up in New York.", Eiji added quietly.

Ash still looked down at the article, staying silent. He wondered how he could have forgotten about that...

He felt how tears ran down his face as the images were still running through his mind. He couldn't even remember when he had ever shed tears and had shown weakness in front of someone else. He felt so pathetic and weak. He didn't like that feeling. Still, Eiji somehow put him at ease. He felt comfortable around him. Just when he wanted to turn away from him and wipe his tears away, Eiji suddenly stood up, slowly put his arms around his shoulders so he could pull out. When Ash didn't react, too astonished at the moment, Eiji moved closer and hugged him.

Ash thought Eiji's hands would go through him, but surprisingly that wasn't the case. Noticing that, Eiji hugged him more closely. Ash relaxed at the touch as a warm feeling spread through his body. At first, he wanted to pull away since touch meant pain for him instinctively. Yet, Eiji's touch felt utterly different. It felt warm, cozy and comfortable. He immediately felt protected and safe, and all of his worries disappeared at once.

"Aslan, you're not alone anymore, ok? I'll help you. I promise. We'll get to the bottom of this. Together."

Ash smiled and wanted to hug Eiji back. But his hands went right through Eiji. Ash abruptly pulled out of the hug and cursed, turning away. He knew it was too good to be true. Wishful thinking. His hands were only meant to kill and hurt people; how could he ever gently touch someone...?

Eiji grabbed his wrist and looked at him, determination flaring up in his eyes.

"Don't. Try again."

"It's no use. I can't touch anyone.", Ash burst out stubbornly, eyes burning brightly.

"Try. Again.", Eiji insisted, his voice gentle but firm. "I think I know why you can't touch people. You told me that touch means something bad for you, right?"

"So?", Ash asked a bit too harshly and immediately regretted it. Eiji just wanted to help him. He didn't deserve his rude outbursts.

"So, you hesitate because you're afraid of getting hurt or to hurt me.", Eiji explained, unfazed by his stubborn commentary. "So try again." Smiling, he held the palm of his hand up in front of him. "Try touching my palm."

When Ash hesitated and looked doubtfully at him, Eiji looked directly into his eyes. "It's fine. You won't hurt me. And you won't be hurt, either. I promise. Just look into my eyes, ok?", Eiji said, smiling encouragingly at him.

Eiji's warmth and compassion radiated in his eyes, so Ash finally found the courage to try. At first, he hesitated again. But when Eiji nodded at him, never stopping to look into his eyes, Ash tried again. Slowly and carefully, he tried to touch Eiji's palm. He looked into his eyes all the time until their fingers touched. And for the first time, Ash's hands didn't go through but hit something solid. He was able to touch Eiji's hand. That was the first time Ash felt a smile spreading across his face. A genuine one.

At the same time, tears ran down his face. Eiji wiped them away with his free hand, never stopping to hold his gaze.

"I told you that you could do it."' Eiji said, gently intertwining their fingers. Ash just stared at their fingers in pure astonishment. He hadn't been able to touch anything since he had appeared here, and Eiji had just figured out the reason behind it so quickly...

Ash pulled his hand away and, without thinking, hugged him. And this time, he could touch Eiji's shoulders. He could feel how Eiji froze up for a moment, then relaxed and hugged him back.

"Thank you.", Ash whispered into his ear. The mere fact that Eiji could touch him and especially that he could touch Eiji gave him new hope. "How did you know?"

"It was just an educated guess on my part.", Eiji admitted sincerely. "I told you that we have many ghost stories in Japan. If people believe in ghosts, they can see them. I thought it should work the same way with touch.", Eiji explained to him. "And you're not a ghost. You're still alive. So, there have to be some differences between ghosts and the comatose state you're currently in."

Ash was so grateful to Eiji that he had discovered how he could touch someone and feel their warmth. He couldn't believe Eiji had done all of that for him. Eiji hadn't just googled his name. He had researched his past for hours or days or he would never have come up with so many details.

"According to the article, the man had been a highly decorated Army vet who trained the kid's baseball team. The residents in your town respected and admired him. So no one believed that he had done something like that. You had gone to the police before with your father, but no one believed you. Not even the police.", Eiji explained to him sadly. "So, shooting the man who hurt you was the only solution you could think of."

"So I'm a bad person. I shot someone when I was a child. I remember everything now. After I did it, I cried. I cried because I didn't feel anything. I'm a killer." Ash muttered the last part more to himself while a tear ran down his cheek.

Eiji took his hand while determination burned in his eyes, making them glow brightly. Eiji's voice was firm and full of confidence when he continued speaking.

"Ash, that's not true. You were the victim, ok? You were scared, hurt and powerless. And by shooting your rapist, you probably saved many other kids from the same fate. And yourself as well. He would probably have killed you, too eventually.", Eiji said, looking directly into his eyes. Ash was stunned. Eiji's warm eyes reflected pure empathy. He was convinced that it wasn't his fault. Maybe he was right?

He had been a kid, after all...

"Thanks to you, the police found the bodies. It was horrible but being able to bury your children gave the parents closure. There's nothing worse than never learning what happened to your child.", Eiji explained to him. "The guy was evil. He was a rapist, a monster and a serial killer. He got what he deserved. You are a hero, not a killer. You knew no one would help you and thought of a solution. Maybe it wasn't the best solution, but it was the only one you could think of as a child. This wasn't your fault at all. Stop blaming yourself for that." Tears suddenly started streaming down Eiji's face.

Ash just stared at him, at a loss for words. The way Eiji explained it, it all made sense. His warmth and compassion made him feel better at once. But why the hell was HE crying?

"Eiji, why are you crying?", Ash quietly asked.

"I cry for your sake. Because you can't. It's just so sad. You shouldn't have gone through all of those horrible experiences at such a young age. I'm so sorry, Aslan.", he sobbed, leaning onto his shoulder. Ash put an arm around him.

"Thank you, Eiji. For researching those events and telling me the truth. Even if it was horrible and disgusting, I'm still glad I remembered my past now. It's better than to be left in the dark. Finding all of that out and telling me that probably wasn't easy for you, either."

"No, it wasn't. But I'm glad I could help you remember some things about your life."Eiji smiled sadly at him while wiping away his tears.

"Unfortunately, that's all I could find out. I don't know how you turned up in New York. You probably ran away after the incident. You lived in a small town, so everyone knew what you had done. It probably wasn't easy to live there afterward."

Ash nodded, trying to hide his disappointment in front of Eiji. He had hoped to learn something about New York because then he maybe would get to the truth about how he ended up in a coma.

Noticing his disappointment, Eiji looked at him encouragingly. "But I found someone else who can answer your questions. I found a good friend of yours. Do you know the person in this photo?", he asked him, showing him a photo of someone with a bright purple mohawk. "His name is Shorter Wong. He's Chinese. He's your best friend, and he worries about you. Maybe he even knows in which hospital you've been treated."

Ash immediately looked at him in astonishment. Eiji had really found someone who knew about his past in New York? And he could also know where he was being treated? That was too good to be true. Could it be that easy...?

Ash stared at the picture. He had seen that person in his memories before, but he couldn't place him. He couldn't remember his name, either. But in the photo, they both looked close.

"You see those sunglasses?" Ash looked at the picture again and nodded.

"Those are Shorter's. Since you're wearing them, it should be proof of how close you are.

Besides, he's wearing one of your hoodies in the picture. I found that hoodie in your old apartment. Will you meet him? I asked him to come here today. He doesn't believe me, you're a ghost, though. Not entirely, at least. And he doesn't trust me, so he didn't tell me everything. But maybe he'll tell you more. You're friends."

"Ok, fine. I get a familiar feeling from him. Where did I meet him?"

"According to Shorter, you met in juvie when you were 14."

"Wait, I was in jail? With 14? Are you serious?"


End file.
